So.. yea. My mind has been running rather nuts lately. With getting ready for college, trying to find work and dealing with everyday stress. Still working on my dog's training.

I never really find myself thinking about love. But tonight, rather this early tuesday morning has got me thinking. Doesn't help that I was talking with a certain friend. Yea, I've never physically met him but that's besides the point. I've known him for close to a year and we drifted for a few months. Our lives went on, things like that happened. But then when we started talking again, he seemed like such a asshole to be honest.

After a while, he invited me to his forum and things slowly started to go back to the way they were when we first started talking. I really do care about hit and tonight just made me realize how much I do care about all of my few close friends that I still have...

Eriku for one. I love him to death and he knows it. Brandon (Von)which he knows how I feel about him.. He's such a big part of me now. Nothing more could ever come of our relationship but that's okay, really. Emily (Nyx/KuroKuro) is like my sister. It's funny how she happened to stumble upon my forum and we've been close friends ever since.

I really only have three close, good friends that I can turn to. Two of which I can't see physically but that's okay. They're here in my heart and I love them to pieces. I can talk to them about anything which makes me extremely happy.

Now.. On about the love thing. I just think back to the whole James thing. Will that happen again? Am I really willing to put my heart at stake like that again? I sure don't know.. But I have to try, I know that much. I hate this alone feeling. I've been longing (not to sound emo here) to just hug someone like I did with James. Someone to cuddle with on a rainy day.

I think I'm just going to let time take it's course.

I just wrote a journal two days ago! ;O I never update this early but a few things came up and a few others have been bothering me. I feel the need to vent..

So, today I went to an open clinic to recieve my H1N1 shot. Well, we left the house at noon. Me and my two sisters had finally recieved our vaccination at 6pm. We were standing in line at the clinic for 6, friggin' hours! What the hell?! Everything was disorganized and it aggravated the hell out of me. XP The head doctor, which is my pediatrician organized the whole thing the wrong way. There was a total of 200 or so people when we arrived. When we got upstairs towards the clinic, there was soon a close 500. Man, oh man were we miserable!

As you all may see, I have been a lot more active on DA. Putting up more of my artistical crap and watching more of you. But that's not what I'm getting at.. What I'm getting at is, is that I am noticing a lot of jackasses on DA. What the shit? If you have nothing nice to say, unless you are critiquing a piece of art work, don't say it at all. There are a lot of flamers here and I can't stand it! Just keep your fingers off of your keyboard and keep your thoughts to yourself. Okay? Just about everyone here on DA works hard on everything we do! We do not appreciate be flamed. So in my words, GTFO!

Well now.. It's still the same here! XD I go for my H1N1 shot tomorrow. I have no issues with needles, obviously. I just hate the nurses at my clinic. XP

I have just uploaded a whole crap load of GFX! >3< They still look n00bish.. I just need to get my hands on a copy of CS4! Then I could improve them and start drawing on the computer.

Currently, at this very moment, I am drawing a picture of Natsuo and Yoji in the bath tub! I should have that finished up in about an hour. Who knows. ;3

Peace&Love

Sammy

So, NOTHING has changed here. Jobless, lazy and so on. =3= I've tried to change thing but I always fail. *shrugs* Feh. Why do I even updating this thing? Oh, I know. Just to bitch like I always do!

My Halloween sucked. I lugged around my little sisters in their wagon and had to drag my dog everywhere.

As for work, I'm going to talk to my grandma about getting a job at my high school. Just taking out trash and so on. They get paid every two weeks, good pay, I'm 18, I'm qualified and my grandma has been working there for 30+ years so I'd have no problem getting in there. But you're probably asking; "Why whould she do that?!" Well, I need a job. I want my mom out of my hair. The end. I don't want to go back to my dreaded high school but what other choice do I have? I've applied everywhere. McD's, Burger King, Arby's, Wal-Mart, Zorba's, Antoinette's, Holiday Restraunt, Walgreens, Old Country Buffet, Spencer's, Hot Topic, Zumiez, Subway, and the list goes on! I got a couple call backs. Had a few interviews. NOTHING.

As for my art goes, it's been going good actually. I've been a drawing nut and my renders are getting better if I do say so myself. I am about to attempt to put my own spin on a group picture. >>; You'll see sooner or later.

Peace&Love

Sammy

I love my journal titles. <3

Anywho, everything is the same here. Jobless. Lazy. Bored. Although, I was talking to one of my good friends last night. I may be stowed away from this house of mine for a few days hopefully.

So.. my mom's phone is broken. -_-; Therefore, she has to use mine. God, I hope my dad can fix her phone or get her a new one ASAP. I have conversations with some of my friends that are not ment for other's eyes. Good thing she can at least recieve calls. >>;

I've been busy with GIMP and drawing! Which makes me happy. I just drew a Tokyo Mew Mew character; Ichigo. She looks adorable! I just have to color her now.. With what, I have not a clue. XD

Playing video games and being online is what consumes most of my day. I'm playing Kingdom Hearts II at the moment. I'mma play Kingdom Hearts and then Kingdom Hearts: Chain of Memories. Backwards, no?