So.. yea. My mind has been running rather nuts lately. With getting ready for college, trying to find work and dealing with everyday stress. Still working on my dog's training.

I never really find myself thinking about love. But tonight, rather this early tuesday morning has got me thinking. Doesn't help that I was talking with a certain friend. Yea, I've never physically met him but that's besides the point. I've known him for close to a year and we drifted for a few months. Our lives went on, things like that happened. But then when we started talking again, he seemed like such a asshole to be honest.

After a while, he invited me to his forum and things slowly started to go back to the way they were when we first started talking. I really do care about hit and tonight just made me realize how much I do care about all of my few close friends that I still have...

Eriku for one. I love him to death and he knows it. Brandon (Von)which he knows how I feel about him.. He's such a big part of me now. Nothing more could ever come of our relationship but that's okay, really. Emily (Nyx/KuroKuro) is like my sister. It's funny how she happened to stumble upon my forum and we've been close friends ever since.

I really only have three close, good friends that I can turn to. Two of which I can't see physically but that's okay. They're here in my heart and I love them to pieces. I can talk to them about anything which makes me extremely happy.

Now.. On about the love thing. I just think back to the whole James thing. Will that happen again? Am I really willing to put my heart at stake like that again? I sure don't know.. But I have to try, I know that much. I hate this alone feeling. I've been longing (not to sound emo here) to just hug someone like I did with James. Someone to cuddle with on a rainy day.

I think I'm just going to let time take it's course.